Tag Archives: Book






41F5WD7AYPL実は、この本の原書には「ベスト・パートナーになるために 男と女が知っておくべき「分かち愛」のルール 男は火星から、女は金星からやってきた」という世界的なベストセラーを書いたジョン・グレイ博士の推薦文がついています。



About My Upcoming Book

As I wrote in this post in January this year, one of my goals was to publish a book. I got a book deal a few month later. I have sent out the final round of revision last week and now I am just waiting for them to send me a finished copy. In the meantime, a few non-Japanese friend asked me what my book will be about, so I decided to write a post.

My book “Cross-Cultural Marriage 101” (Japanese Title: “Kokusai Kekkon Ichinensei”). I wrote this book in Japanese for Japanese people who are seriously considering marrying a non-Japanese person. They can be engaged to get married, or dating a foreign partner for a while, or simply entertaining the idea about it because they think that it might be a better option for them based on their belief formed by their life experiences.

It is a lighthearted, yet serious and insightful book about what Japanese people should be aware of before  entering a marriage with a non-Japanese person, to increase their chances at  successfully creating a happy, long lasting and peaceful family.

I’m working on getting this book to major Japanese bookstores in other countries as well. If you have Japanese-reading friends who could use this book, please let them know about it. They can either get this book on Amazon.com or ask the Japanese bookstores in their town to order from Japan. I’m also in touch with Japanese U.S. Military bases in Japan as it has a special chapter about marrying a U.S. military personnel.

Hopefully I will get English version of this book published next!

Book Contents:

<Chapter 1> Is marrying a non-Japanese person intrinsically more difficult compared to marrying a Japanese person?

1.What’s your “Deal-Breaker”?
2.The reason why “Cross-Cultural Marriage” is said to be more risky
3.Benefit of “Cross-Cultural Marriage”
4.Does love conquer all?
5.Check sheet for your “Cross-Cultural Marriage preparedness”

<Chapter 2>  Why do you want to marry a non-Japanese person?

1.The real reason of why you want to marry that person
2.Be aware of your stereotype “If you are from XXX country, you must be YYY”
3.Is your “Dream life in XYZ country” real or an illusion?
4.The reason why you want to get your family onboard before the wedding day
5.A few words for the parents

<Chapter 3> Did you talk about this yet?

1.Things you need to know before moving to your spouse’s country
2.Things you need to know if you continue to live in Japan with your spouse
3.Your aptitude for a “nomadic” life
4.Could both of you live in each other’s country?
5.Critical factor – Eating habits
6.How good is your foreign language skill?
7.What are your expectations for your spouse’s Japanese language skill?
8.Don’t give up on communication
9.True nature of your relationship
10.Let’s talk about money
11.Do you know “pre-nuptial agreement”?
12.Insurance for rainy days
13.Where would you like to live when you retire?
14.Planning ahead – what happens when your spouse suddenly dies
15.How well do you know your partner’s family?
16.How many kids would you like to have – if any?
17.Raising your cross-cultural children
18.Know the Child Protection Law
19.It isn’t  easy to raise a bilingual child
20.Double income or single income?
21.Pursue independence so you can both be happy
22.How well do you know your partner’s friends and hobbies?
23.What’s your religion?
24.What’s your political view?
25.Your partner’s anger management skills
26.Asking for professional help
27.“Marriage” means to be on the same team
28.If you are marrying a millitary personnel

<Chapter 4> In case of Divorce

1.Increase of divorce rate
2.When divorce doesn’t fix things

<Chapter 5> Happy Cross-Cultural Marriage

1.It’s up to you
2.Get to know your partner’s many faces
3.Success stories


Writing A Book

In my blog entry posted on Jan 22, I wrote “publish a book” as one of my goals. When I cbsntype-main_fullwrote it, I had no idea how I was going to make it happen. In the same blog post, I also wrote that “What” always comes before “How”. The first thing I did was to put it on my vision board.

I then started talking to people and asking those who have published how they did it. I went back to Japan for 2.5 weeks in March with my family, where I met lots of people. Most of them were my friends I’ve known for years, but I also met new people, two of them I discovered through social media. I continued discussing my book ideas with them. One person gave me advice on how to write a book proposal, another person shared effective presentation techniques to book editors, yet another suggested how to identify potential publishing companies for my book ideas by going to bookstores. Two days before I left Japan, I got a call inviting me to meet up with an editor of a publishing company. I met her the next day, and I presented my proposals, and I came back to San Diego. Then, just a few days ago, I learned that they liked my proposal and that they thought it was worth publishing!

I am just amazed at how quickly this whole thing is unfolding. Some might call it luck, and I certainly feel very fortunate, but I believe that this series of events came about because I put my focus on it. Now I am very excited that I get to actually write this book. I intend to enjoy the every step of this journey.

Opportunity Is….

I recently had a chance to take a peak at this book called “Survivor’s Club” (Japanese 416woct79rl__sl500_aa300_translation) at Kodansha International office while waiting for someone. In this book, the author Ben Sherwood showcased several survivors of catastrophic real-life events in attempt to examine what it takes to survive such an event and to gain insight of “the secrets and science that could save your life” which is the tag-line of this book. It looked interesting and I scanned through it for a few minutes, and I came across this web-site URL:


What did you think about this URL?

According to the author of this book, this works as a simple yet effective test to see if you have “glass half-full” or “half-empty” type of mentality. You might have read this as “opportunity is nowhere”. Well it’s not very encouraging, right? The other way to read this is “opportunity is now here”.  Remember, your brain will look for evidence of your beliefs – whether it is true or not. Look for opportunities and you will find them, it’s all around you. Same goes for love – look for love, and it is all around you. Look for supportive friends if you are going for your dreams, and I can assure you, you will find them. I suppose you can also guess which type of people is more likely to survive in the catastrophic events. Do you have what it takes to be one of them?

Vision Board

Last night I attended “4th Annual Making the Most of Your Personal Strategy New Year Kickoff” event where a group of women got together and each of us created a vision board for 2010. This event was hosted by Ms.Angie Swartz, a founder of Six Figure Moms Club. She is a radio show host, an author, and a social media specialist who owns her own company called “Square Martini Media”. Moreover, she is also a source of inspiration to many of us working women and mothers. At the vision-board-11beginning of the event, she asked who had attended this event last year, the year before….and I realized that this was my 4th time attending this event. She again hired Dining Details to cater the food for the evening – the owners and chef couple Julie and Robbie cooked scrumptious appetizers and desserts while we enjoyed sipping wine, chatted among ourselves, flipped through magazines and cut out images that spoke to us for our vision board. It was a fantastic opportunity for us to connect, and take time to think about what we wanted to focus on this year. Continue reading

Pain is Inevitable, but Suffering is Optional

The title is a phrase that I just heard today while listening to Haruki Murakami‘s book “What I talk about when I talk about running”. It’s Murakami’s memoir, a book about being professional writer and a (amateur) runner. Chris Guillebeau, who I just got to know of about 2 weeks ago, talked about this book(Chris is a big fan of Murakami) in his report “279 Days to Overnight Success“. I’ve read most of Murakmi’s novels, but didn’t know this one partly because I had not gone back to Japan for a few years. I immediately checked the local library and got the book on CD – my favorite way of “reading” books these days during my commute. It was strange listening to this book translated in English – I tried to imagine how it’s written in Japanese, the original language, while listening to the story.

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